“Just” not “Sorry?” How to be Empowered by the Words You Use

Posted by Nicola Fox on June 26, 2018  /   Posted in Confidence Hints and Tips
Make sure you don't undermine yourself - speak positively and let everyone see how confident you are.

Let your words empower you – speak positively and create a great impression.

How we speak creates an impression:

No-one should be told how to speak but it is true that some words and phrases give a better (or worse) impression – and this impression is being created all day, every day, every time we interact. It crops up face-to-face, on the telephone, in emails, in social media posts – the list goes on.

Are you undermining yourself?

So it is worth considering the phrases you use, and whether you could be undermining yourself without realising it.

For example:


Do you find yourself saying “Sorry” when an apology isn’t required, or you’ve not heard what someone has said? Obviously you should apologise when you have done something wrong, but using “sorry” as your go-to word in conversation makes you appear submissive or lacking in confidence.

“It’s probably me being stupid, but …”

Prefacing your questions with the phrase “It’s probably me being stupid, but …” (or something similar) is another credibility-killer.  Remember, there is no such thing as a stupid question – if you don’t know something, you need to ask.


“Just”can be another submissive word that creeps into our conversation, as in “I was just wondering …” or “Could I just ask you to …”.  Using the word isn’t necessary, and it undermines your authority.


At the other end of the scale, swearing can seem aggressive and unprofessional. It can also imply a lack of debating ability, a poor education or a weak vocabulary.

Make sure your pet phrases are house-trained

And there are lots of others, so listen carefully at your vocabulary. It’s easy to get into the habit of using ‘verbal ticks’, pet phrases we use without thinking.

But if they are undermining how you appear to others, they are doing you an injustice – so make sure they are house-trained, and don’t do anything to embarrass you.

So remember: Empower yourself – speak positively and let everyone see how good you really are.

For more advice, go to the Free Advice tab at the top of this page.

About Nicola Fox Dip. THP (N-SHAP)

I specialise in hypnotherapy and confidence coaching for professional people who want to achieve their full potential, either 1-2-1 or in a masterclass environment.

For 13 years, I have enabled my clients to become:

  • more confident,
  • more self-assured and
  • better able to achieve their goals.

I offer 1-2-1 hypnotherapy, am a professional public speaker and run masterclasses for groups.

1-2-1 programmes are tailored specifically for each client, personalised to provide individual solutions for their issues.

I specialise in hypnotherapy for:

• Anxiety
• Confidence
• Fear of public speaking, presentations and interviews
• Imposter Syndrome
• Motivation
• Panic attacks
• Phobias and fears
• Procrastination
• Self-esteem
• Stress
• Weight loss & related issues
• Regaining confidence after a crisis – redundancy, divorce, bereavement, etc
• Relaxation

Find out how hypnotherapy can help you – get your free, confidential 15-minute telephone consultation.

You can arrange your confidential, 15-minute telephone consultation by going to the Contact Me tab at the top of this page.

I have hypnotherapy practices in:


Liverpool Street, EC2 and
• Islington, N1

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